Have you ever met a person that lies all the time? It can be about the most basic things, like, what did you have for breakfast? And this person will make up an overly-exaggerated lie that you can immediately detect. If someone you know fits that description, how do you interact with that person? Can they say anything that you actually believe?
I believe most people would distance themselves from pathological liars. And they wouldn’t believe a single thing that person said without running it through a fact-check system. Wouldn’t you agree?
So what makes it different when our negative inner-voice lies to us?
What motivates us to believe lies such as: “You will never become successful”, “You’re so unattractive, no one wants to date you”, “Stop trying, something’s going to go wrong anyway”, “You’re never going to land your dream job, you just need to collect your paycheck and be happy” … Care to add more?
Often, I believe we begin to accept those lies, because they speak the loudest. They hold concerts in our minds and prevent us from hearing our positive inner voice.
But do you know what controls the amplification of our negative inner-voice?
Our thoughts. Our negative inner-voice starts as a whisper; once it latches onto a thought, it starts getting louder. Eventually, backed by an army of thoughts, our negative inner-voice consumes us.
But here’s the good news, the same process works for our positive inner-voice. When your negative inner-voice starts spewing lies, stop and listen for your positive inner-voice that serves as your fact-check system. It’ll say, “That’s not true, you will be successful”, “That’s not true, you are a beautiful person and there’s someone who will love you unconditionally”, “That’s not true, if you stop trying, you will never see how much better things can get”, “That’s not true, your dream job is just around the corner- just keep working hard”. Dedicate all your thoughts to what your positive inner-voice is telling you; and your negative inner-voice will be silenced. I mean what’s the benefit of listening to our negative inner-voice anyway? It’d probably lie about what they had for breakfast.
“The most influential and frequent voice you hear is your inner-voice. It can work in your favor or against you, depending on what you listen to and act upon.” -Maddy Malhotra